Home but not Home

I've been a little depressed since I got home (and believe you me, I'm not the 'get depressed' type), but only until I saw my family. My son gave me the tightest hug ever and I caught up with fam and friends to tell them all about the LIB experience. I wasn't gone long enough to really need to readjust, but still I began to notice some of the stark differences b/t life here and in Liberia. For one, I enjoyed my smooth car ride but was annoyed with having to stop at traffic lights. lol. Plus, everyone just seems to be so disconnected too. The main emotion I felt was, for lack of pinpointing what it is, loneliness or disjointed, somehow. There was a closeness, sense of community and belonging, even purpose, in Liberia that I don't feel here. And I always knew there was something absent about life here but it was becoming all I knew. Now I know different again, and getting reacquainted with where I came from was a gift from God esp under the circumstances of my return home. Don't get me wrong--I love America, much like I love my own step-mother. But a step-mother, as good as she might be to you, can never be your real mother.

Another lil funny observation I had was when I got in the shower and turned the water on, I was hit by the smell of chlorine (or summin!). I had been so used to American water for 19 years, never having traveled outside the US since I came, I didn't realize that the smell of water could be so different. I haven't put the TV on since I came home (not even to watch my 24 o!). I felt so much more productive in Liberia--maybe b/c we worked our butts off--but it feels good to not have the lil distractions that America provides. It really does give you more time to spend with people and enjoy and appreciate the simpler things in life (long conversations, a cold drink on the beach, etc etc).

In any case, I am happy to be home in my own bed, with my own things and my own fam....now if only I could just transplant all those things to a place in my own country.


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